OK
So in my opinion the most fucked up to date.
No really.
This is on the uber there's nothing left to loose side of fucked up.
Just say, for instance, hubby leaves me, takes kids, I have no where to go, no money,no hope,no nothing. Well this is a viable option in my opinion.
And here is why.
You get medical attention, something I love by the way. (but i don't deliberately make it, this is worst case scenario here people keep that in mind, i DO NOT HAVE MUNCHHAUSEN SYNDROME), and after you get time in a safe,warm mental institution for as long as you can play the crazy card. And for me, that would be easy as I can act like a mutha fucker.
I kinda hope I never have to use this one.
I actually kinda scares me.
But I could lump the elude and run from and fight with cops one in here but still this is kinda scary.
Sad thing is I even know where I would do this and what time of the year, hey i do not want poison ivy again and I need to be able to avoid the PI also.
Someday I might post the pic of where and what time of year just so you uber righteous freaks, and to me YOU are the freaks, can alert the local PD if you figure out where and they will put extra patrols there and maybe even bring the party van to my door and I will say "hey yall it's just horror fic. I am a writer, like the female Steven King, only more gore and twizted." they will leave and you will look like a fool.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Friday, October 26, 2012
LOSS OF CONCIOUSNESS
I know I know.
They CLAIM it causes brain damage.
I could live with a few less of these annoying cells. LOL
NO really my brain just pisses me off.
I even know how when and where I want all these incidences to take place.
We have a greenbelt here. I want at least 2 there. Tried all this summer to get heat stroke to no avail. Going to go for it again next summer as often as possible.
I mean I really do not know what its like to pass the fuck on out.
I have never.
I would like to know what this is like.
The other place would be like in the er. Maybe piggy back several FUL items together.
Also, and yall will either love this or hate it, at a so called family gathering like Christmas or something. I mean at EVERY and I do mean EVERY family get together there is some bullshit drama about money (except perfect Kyles wedding that was all drama about me being there, i have no idea why and all i wanted to do was leave) and well i think it would be so awesome if I could just go unconscious and need EMS right after hubbys dad starting his money bullshit games.
Thats it.
For now.
Might add to this or any blog if a new desire/want comes up.
Just keep watching.
They CLAIM it causes brain damage.
I could live with a few less of these annoying cells. LOL
NO really my brain just pisses me off.
I even know how when and where I want all these incidences to take place.
We have a greenbelt here. I want at least 2 there. Tried all this summer to get heat stroke to no avail. Going to go for it again next summer as often as possible.
I mean I really do not know what its like to pass the fuck on out.
I have never.
I would like to know what this is like.
The other place would be like in the er. Maybe piggy back several FUL items together.
Also, and yall will either love this or hate it, at a so called family gathering like Christmas or something. I mean at EVERY and I do mean EVERY family get together there is some bullshit drama about money (except perfect Kyles wedding that was all drama about me being there, i have no idea why and all i wanted to do was leave) and well i think it would be so awesome if I could just go unconscious and need EMS right after hubbys dad starting his money bullshit games.
Thats it.
For now.
Might add to this or any blog if a new desire/want comes up.
Just keep watching.
Thursday, October 18, 2012
CARPEL TUNNEL
Looks like this one is starting again.
I have actually been relativly symptom free for many years.
I was first diagnosed back when I was 20 but after months of braces it basically went away.
IT would be a bitch once or twice a year for a few days to up to 2 wks with the numbness and slight pain but it was deal able.
But now its almost a constant.
I am planning on just ignoring it as I do not want his family saying that I want attention and then refusing help because they think I am doing it to take away from his carpel tunnel.
Eventually, like with 95% of what goes wrong with me I will HAVE to go get it looked at and HOPE the dr fixes it and not just here wear these again and hope it goes away.
Fuck that shit.
I want the surgery, and attention from it.
However, because he has it I will be given 6 tones of shit if I get the surgery first or even second being told that I am just looking for attention.
I wish.
OK yeah I do wish. I wish I had found a better man with a better family that I wouldn't have to say or be made to feel these things.
Yes I do want the surgery because I just want it gone. No lets do this half ass and hope. I am tired of that shit. Just make it go the fuck away so I can move the fuck on.
And please let me enjoy my convelese and not have to do laundry and dishes the next day. Yes that has happened before. The day after my c-section and six weeks later after my tubal surgery the very next day I was expected to be up doing both because he would say i will do that and then 4 hours later it would still not be done and he was still playing video games and his mom said I will come over and help and then had some bull shit excuse as to why she couldn't. And they wonder why I wanna leave.
It's back and has been for several days and this time i had the spike in the wrist feeling which means its getting worse but I still need to wait until its crippling because fuck yeah I wanna be carved on.
Normal life.
Normal shit.
That's all I want.
And to me this is normal.
I have actually been relativly symptom free for many years.
I was first diagnosed back when I was 20 but after months of braces it basically went away.
IT would be a bitch once or twice a year for a few days to up to 2 wks with the numbness and slight pain but it was deal able.
But now its almost a constant.
I am planning on just ignoring it as I do not want his family saying that I want attention and then refusing help because they think I am doing it to take away from his carpel tunnel.
Eventually, like with 95% of what goes wrong with me I will HAVE to go get it looked at and HOPE the dr fixes it and not just here wear these again and hope it goes away.
Fuck that shit.
I want the surgery, and attention from it.
However, because he has it I will be given 6 tones of shit if I get the surgery first or even second being told that I am just looking for attention.
I wish.
OK yeah I do wish. I wish I had found a better man with a better family that I wouldn't have to say or be made to feel these things.
Yes I do want the surgery because I just want it gone. No lets do this half ass and hope. I am tired of that shit. Just make it go the fuck away so I can move the fuck on.
And please let me enjoy my convelese and not have to do laundry and dishes the next day. Yes that has happened before. The day after my c-section and six weeks later after my tubal surgery the very next day I was expected to be up doing both because he would say i will do that and then 4 hours later it would still not be done and he was still playing video games and his mom said I will come over and help and then had some bull shit excuse as to why she couldn't. And they wonder why I wanna leave.
It's back and has been for several days and this time i had the spike in the wrist feeling which means its getting worse but I still need to wait until its crippling because fuck yeah I wanna be carved on.
Normal life.
Normal shit.
That's all I want.
And to me this is normal.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
ACCIDENTAL BAD CUT
When I say accidental I mean like for real accidental. Like cutting up veggies/meat or stepping on something or add it in with the auto accident or possibly falling down a hill.
Whatever or however I want it to be er worthy and stiches worthy and like deep and bad to the point of battle scar. But with my luck it usualy heals so well the battle scar is not very visible and that pisses me off. I like my battle scars.
I have another cutting FUL but that one will be for another day.
Whatever or however I want it to be er worthy and stiches worthy and like deep and bad to the point of battle scar. But with my luck it usualy heals so well the battle scar is not very visible and that pisses me off. I like my battle scars.
I have another cutting FUL but that one will be for another day.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
EMERGENCY GALL BLADDER SURGERY
This one is looking very highly in the works.
Since May it's been gearing up.
Yeah, I COULD go to dr and get it delt with but it's on my list and I have done the research and it wont kill me to let it go caustic (unlike the appendix) and I would like a few emergency surgeries.
Do no know how many precicely but when I am done wanting them I will stop doing things to encourage them.
Shut up.
Your fucked up too or you would not be reading this.
Since May it's been gearing up.
Yeah, I COULD go to dr and get it delt with but it's on my list and I have done the research and it wont kill me to let it go caustic (unlike the appendix) and I would like a few emergency surgeries.
Do no know how many precicely but when I am done wanting them I will stop doing things to encourage them.
Shut up.
Your fucked up too or you would not be reading this.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
T-BONE CAR ACCIDENT
Ah yes.
Another one hubbys g d family tried to take from me.
I guess they did in a way.
His mom and dad got it but it wasn't a full on real t bone it was back from the b pillar just enough to not be a full on one so I can still get this one with out feeling too bad.
I know.
I should not feel bad about illness/injury/accident just because hubbys family has/had it but I do.
I feel like they will be all butt hurt or think I did it to get attention.
OK no lies, I would like the attention but not because someone else had/has.
They have a lot of stuff I want nothing to do with.
Back to the title->
It has to be on my side of the vehicle and my kids CAN NOT be in the car. This is for me not them and it would then be all about them and I would have to take back burner again (like the OR accident) and I am so fucking tired of that.
That's all, for today...
AND NOW MORE...
Had an awesome dream about this happening.
Still not exactly as I would make it happen if i could.
It wasn't right on the drivers door it was right behind the drivers side headlight on the other car and the A pillar in the drivers side of the car we currently have,
Blew a shit ton of glass out of the car and i got all cut up and my back swelled so bad i couldn't walk for a while and i had some kind of brain injury but no broken bones, dang it.
Anyway the car had to be all cut up to get me out, i know cause hubby showed me pics.
I was alone, thank the Force.
I had peeled out onto the main road because i was all pissed at our neighbors again because hypochondriac neighbor lady was all whining about shit and hubby was buying into it and i was just plain fed with her shit (which I am IRL BTW).
Apparently hubby had yet to replace the crap battery in the car and what should have been an easy trip across traffic, the car stalled refused to restart and an inattentive driver in an older model black compact Toyota (I THINK) *WHAM* right into the car. He tried to stop, laid impressive rubber, but his breaks were going or something and he couldn't stop in time.
SO there it is, another "sorta getting what I want" but in a dream.
Now, hopefully this wont get stolen from me by like hubby or something.
That would just piss me off to the point of almost, if not, just saying you take too much of my stuff go fuck yourself i am leaving you so there is no one to take the shit I want.
Another one hubbys g d family tried to take from me.
I guess they did in a way.
His mom and dad got it but it wasn't a full on real t bone it was back from the b pillar just enough to not be a full on one so I can still get this one with out feeling too bad.
I know.
I should not feel bad about illness/injury/accident just because hubbys family has/had it but I do.
I feel like they will be all butt hurt or think I did it to get attention.
OK no lies, I would like the attention but not because someone else had/has.
They have a lot of stuff I want nothing to do with.
Back to the title->
It has to be on my side of the vehicle and my kids CAN NOT be in the car. This is for me not them and it would then be all about them and I would have to take back burner again (like the OR accident) and I am so fucking tired of that.
That's all, for today...
AND NOW MORE...
Had an awesome dream about this happening.
Still not exactly as I would make it happen if i could.
It wasn't right on the drivers door it was right behind the drivers side headlight on the other car and the A pillar in the drivers side of the car we currently have,
Blew a shit ton of glass out of the car and i got all cut up and my back swelled so bad i couldn't walk for a while and i had some kind of brain injury but no broken bones, dang it.
Anyway the car had to be all cut up to get me out, i know cause hubby showed me pics.
I was alone, thank the Force.
I had peeled out onto the main road because i was all pissed at our neighbors again because hypochondriac neighbor lady was all whining about shit and hubby was buying into it and i was just plain fed with her shit (which I am IRL BTW).
Apparently hubby had yet to replace the crap battery in the car and what should have been an easy trip across traffic, the car stalled refused to restart and an inattentive driver in an older model black compact Toyota (I THINK) *WHAM* right into the car. He tried to stop, laid impressive rubber, but his breaks were going or something and he couldn't stop in time.
SO there it is, another "sorta getting what I want" but in a dream.
Now, hopefully this wont get stolen from me by like hubby or something.
That would just piss me off to the point of almost, if not, just saying you take too much of my stuff go fuck yourself i am leaving you so there is no one to take the shit I want.
Monday, October 8, 2012
The HEART ATTACK
Let me lead with I have a heart condition so this one is highly possible.
I would like to have one.
Just mild to medium one.
Not one that would require surgery or anything. Open heart surgery scares the living fuck outta me.
But one bad enough to get me 2 days in the hospital and everyone being told that I am not to be stressed out.
I have already been told this.
In 1997 the heart condition reared its ugly head and put me in the er but all they did was watch it for a few hours and run some stupid blood tests take an xray and told me to go home and get rest. HA! I was put to work twice as hard the next day by the old hag.
Yes hubby knows I am not to be stressed out. Now more than ever with the diabetes also but well no one here gives a shit either so it's just a matter of time with this FUL item to be checked off.
Also my 7 yo is in er right now he poked himself in the eye with a chewed on glow stick (yes I told him not to chew it, and obviously...). That kid is using up all his er cards on jakassery way to fast. I still have a stack of jackassery cards and a stack of er cards and a stack of ambulance cards and I wanna play them. OK maybe not the jackassery cards so much but the other 2 would be nice.
I would like to have one.
Just mild to medium one.
Not one that would require surgery or anything. Open heart surgery scares the living fuck outta me.
But one bad enough to get me 2 days in the hospital and everyone being told that I am not to be stressed out.
I have already been told this.
In 1997 the heart condition reared its ugly head and put me in the er but all they did was watch it for a few hours and run some stupid blood tests take an xray and told me to go home and get rest. HA! I was put to work twice as hard the next day by the old hag.
Yes hubby knows I am not to be stressed out. Now more than ever with the diabetes also but well no one here gives a shit either so it's just a matter of time with this FUL item to be checked off.
Also my 7 yo is in er right now he poked himself in the eye with a chewed on glow stick (yes I told him not to chew it, and obviously...). That kid is using up all his er cards on jakassery way to fast. I still have a stack of jackassery cards and a stack of er cards and a stack of ambulance cards and I wanna play them. OK maybe not the jackassery cards so much but the other 2 would be nice.
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